In
times like these, we are each being bombarded with a thousand different
emotions every single day, most of them unpleasant. There is a lot of
fear going around, for obvious reasons. We might feel anxious, stressed,
overwhelmed. For those of us who struggle with anxiety and depression
in the norm, this is a whole new level. But even those of us who
generally feel pretty capable and level headed are being tested. Many of
us feel alone, unsure, and weary of the new burdens being placed on us.
But what do we do with all of these negative emotions? As Christians,
we are taught to be joyful at best, at the very least content. Our lives
should be marked with peace that passes understanding, joy unspeakable,
and the contentment of a sheep who knows they have a good shepherd
taking care of them. God is good. The Lord provides. He has the ultimate
victory.
Even now in the season of Easter, a holiday marking the greatest victory of all: the defeat of death and the grave! Jesus was victorious, death couldn't hold him down. It rings true, but it's also difficult to muster the typical enthusiasm when you are stuck at home alone, away from your family and friends, and people all over the world are sick and dying. We are stuck in the uncertainty of not knowing what tomorrow will bring. We don't really know when this will all be over, and phrases like "the new normal" sound scarily permanent.
Am I saying there is no power in the resurrection? Of course not! It holds the same power as the day it commemorates, regardless of how we feel. However, does that mean how we feel is irrelevant? Equally wrong. God cares about how we feel. One of Jesus' closest friends, Peter, tells us to "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7). He invites us to share our anxieties with him, why? Because he cares.
Hear me, I'm not saying things are hopeless. I'm not saying God isn't on the throne. I'm not even saying that we shouldn't feel peaceful, hopeful, or joyful. What I am saying is that IF and when we don't, it's okay. God has not forsaken you. He is not disappointed in you because of how you feel. He is not impatient with you, rolling his eyes or thinking "Get it together!" He's not embarrassed by you, nor does he think you are making him look bad. No, no, quite the contrary. He cares for you. He cries with you. He wants to comfort you, not scold you. Sometimes the only way to comfort someone in grief is to just be with them, to cry with them, to sit with them in their sadness. God can do that for you, he longs to.
Jesus talks about the Holy Spirit in John 14:26, the word he uses to describe the Holy Spirit is "parakletos" which is translated in the ESV as "helper" but is sometimes translated, "comforter". Thayer's definition of this word says "summoned, called to one's side, esp. called to one's aid". The Holy Spirit is with you, to comfort you and to help you, he is by your side no matter what. No quarantine or government order or anything else can separate you, as Paul promises us in Romans 8:37-39. In fact, I would really recommend reading Romans 8 whenever you feel discouraged. It feels uncomfortably relevant in the time we are living.
Scripture repeatedly shows us how God interacts with His people and their emotions and feelings. In 2 Kings 20 the king of Israel, Hezekiah, fell ill and the prophet Isaiah brought a word from the Lord. The word was, "Set your house in order, for you shall die; you shall not recover." Not a very happy word. Hezekiah was, for good reason, devastated. In fact, it says he wept bitterly. But, then in verse 5 God says, "I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears. Behold, I will heal you." Now, this is a pretty strange and interesting story, and I'm not trying to dive into full interpretation mode here. The main thing I want you to see is God's loving response. He heard his prayer, he saw his tears, and was moved to compassion, and mercy. I'm not making claims about what God will or won't do in this time of suffering, his ways are not my ways and his thoughts are higher than mine (Isaiah 55:8). I don't pretend to fully understand them. However, I do know this. He loves you. He cares for you. He sees your tears and he hears your prayers. You can press into him during this trying time and find comfort.
Similarly in Exodus 3:7 the Lord says, after Israel had been enslaved by Egypt for hundreds of years, "I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings," and then in verse 9, "And now, behold, the cry of the people of Israel has come to me, and I have also seen the oppression with which the Egyptians oppress them." Again, I'm not going into a whole exegesis on the full story here, but I do want to draw on this revealed truth about the character of God, he sees you. He hears you. And he cares.
God is not afraid of emotion, nor does he shun it or look down upon it, even though we humans, even Christians, are often drawn to do so. God does not ask us to put a smile on our face and pretend not to feel. He doesn't ask us to lie to ourselves or others. He asks us to come as we are. The Psalmists understood this about God. They weren't afraid to express their true, raw emotion. Even their doubts, fears, and disappointments in God with regard to what was going on in and around them. Especially David, whom God called a man after his own heart (Acts 13:22). It is David's words Jesus quoted on the cross, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Psalm 22:1). There's no reason for us to be ashamed of our emotions. We can unhesitatingly bring them before our loving father and in turn, I believe, he will mourn with us and ultimately comfort us.
It seems strange for me to give you permission to feel. But maybe that's what some of us need. I know I did. I've struggled with severe anxiety as long as I can remember. Even as a young child I fretted about things I could not control. Thoughts whirled around in my head until I was paralyzed with overwhelming anxiety.
Having grown up in the church I knew I should trust God. "God is in control," "The Joy of the Lord is your strength," "Don't be anxious". As true and well meaning as these things are, they brought little to no comfort when in the grip of such feelings. And let me tell you, that brought me such shame. I felt like a failure as a Christian. Obviously I wasn't really trusting God, anxiety was the proof! Fear and worry are sins, I was told, I should repent. No matter how much I tried to bury or ignore my feelings, they were still there. No matter how much I loved God and believed He was big enough, great enough, victorious enough to conquer my fears, I still felt them. They were still very real for me.
One day, sitting in what used to be a motorcycle dealership in a small town in the Midwest, I heard a sermon about Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane on the eve of his crucifixion. The pastor spoke about the anxiety Jesus felt, the sweat like drops of blood. I had heard the story a thousand times but I never heard it this way. Suddenly, I felt the presence of God comforting me. As if he were saying, "It's okay, child. I understand." Jesus was able to feel that anxiety, and not sin. He was able to feel those things, and still submit to the will of the Father, still choose to trust God in spite of it.
Jesus understands my anxiety?! It seemed too good to be true. He wasn't disappointed in me? Embarrassed by me? Could it be true? My heart felt immediately lighter, like a heavy weight had been lifted. It was okay to feel this way. He was with me. He understood. It may sound strange, but this changed the way I felt about myself and ultimately how I viewed God. I started attending that small church and over the next three years God continued to reveal to me Jesus as the man of sorrows (Isaiah 53:3).
My anxiety never went away, it still comes and goes in waves of intensity. But I no longer felt alone in it, or guilty and ashamed. I knew my God was truly with me in the midst of my sorrow, holding my hand, weathering the storm. That gave me greater courage to endure the hard times. I still have anxiety attacks, sometimes they are debilitating. But what I understand now, and what I want you to understand, is that it is okay to feel these things. It is okay to feel. Sometimes feelings are negative, and that is okay, too. Do we want to feel negative things? Of course not. But that is not a comfort when we do. We can't change the way we feel, so sometimes we just need to give ourselves permission to just feel these things. And instead of trying to hide them or ignore them, we should bring them to the Father. Share them with the Holy Spirit, our comforter and advocate. Not because we are looking for an answer, but because we know we are not alone. And that sometimes is all the comfort we need.
The beauty of Easter is not only that Jesus defeated death and the grave, which is magnificent, but WHY he did it. He did it so he could be with you! So we would no longer be separated by sin. He endured all of that sorrow just so he could be in communion with us. Even in this period of isolation we are so not alone it's not even funny. We have the best company in the universe! Let's spend this Easter enjoying him!
Even now in the season of Easter, a holiday marking the greatest victory of all: the defeat of death and the grave! Jesus was victorious, death couldn't hold him down. It rings true, but it's also difficult to muster the typical enthusiasm when you are stuck at home alone, away from your family and friends, and people all over the world are sick and dying. We are stuck in the uncertainty of not knowing what tomorrow will bring. We don't really know when this will all be over, and phrases like "the new normal" sound scarily permanent.
Am I saying there is no power in the resurrection? Of course not! It holds the same power as the day it commemorates, regardless of how we feel. However, does that mean how we feel is irrelevant? Equally wrong. God cares about how we feel. One of Jesus' closest friends, Peter, tells us to "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7). He invites us to share our anxieties with him, why? Because he cares.
Hear me, I'm not saying things are hopeless. I'm not saying God isn't on the throne. I'm not even saying that we shouldn't feel peaceful, hopeful, or joyful. What I am saying is that IF and when we don't, it's okay. God has not forsaken you. He is not disappointed in you because of how you feel. He is not impatient with you, rolling his eyes or thinking "Get it together!" He's not embarrassed by you, nor does he think you are making him look bad. No, no, quite the contrary. He cares for you. He cries with you. He wants to comfort you, not scold you. Sometimes the only way to comfort someone in grief is to just be with them, to cry with them, to sit with them in their sadness. God can do that for you, he longs to.
Jesus talks about the Holy Spirit in John 14:26, the word he uses to describe the Holy Spirit is "parakletos" which is translated in the ESV as "helper" but is sometimes translated, "comforter". Thayer's definition of this word says "summoned, called to one's side, esp. called to one's aid". The Holy Spirit is with you, to comfort you and to help you, he is by your side no matter what. No quarantine or government order or anything else can separate you, as Paul promises us in Romans 8:37-39. In fact, I would really recommend reading Romans 8 whenever you feel discouraged. It feels uncomfortably relevant in the time we are living.
Scripture repeatedly shows us how God interacts with His people and their emotions and feelings. In 2 Kings 20 the king of Israel, Hezekiah, fell ill and the prophet Isaiah brought a word from the Lord. The word was, "Set your house in order, for you shall die; you shall not recover." Not a very happy word. Hezekiah was, for good reason, devastated. In fact, it says he wept bitterly. But, then in verse 5 God says, "I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears. Behold, I will heal you." Now, this is a pretty strange and interesting story, and I'm not trying to dive into full interpretation mode here. The main thing I want you to see is God's loving response. He heard his prayer, he saw his tears, and was moved to compassion, and mercy. I'm not making claims about what God will or won't do in this time of suffering, his ways are not my ways and his thoughts are higher than mine (Isaiah 55:8). I don't pretend to fully understand them. However, I do know this. He loves you. He cares for you. He sees your tears and he hears your prayers. You can press into him during this trying time and find comfort.
Similarly in Exodus 3:7 the Lord says, after Israel had been enslaved by Egypt for hundreds of years, "I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings," and then in verse 9, "And now, behold, the cry of the people of Israel has come to me, and I have also seen the oppression with which the Egyptians oppress them." Again, I'm not going into a whole exegesis on the full story here, but I do want to draw on this revealed truth about the character of God, he sees you. He hears you. And he cares.
God is not afraid of emotion, nor does he shun it or look down upon it, even though we humans, even Christians, are often drawn to do so. God does not ask us to put a smile on our face and pretend not to feel. He doesn't ask us to lie to ourselves or others. He asks us to come as we are. The Psalmists understood this about God. They weren't afraid to express their true, raw emotion. Even their doubts, fears, and disappointments in God with regard to what was going on in and around them. Especially David, whom God called a man after his own heart (Acts 13:22). It is David's words Jesus quoted on the cross, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Psalm 22:1). There's no reason for us to be ashamed of our emotions. We can unhesitatingly bring them before our loving father and in turn, I believe, he will mourn with us and ultimately comfort us.
It seems strange for me to give you permission to feel. But maybe that's what some of us need. I know I did. I've struggled with severe anxiety as long as I can remember. Even as a young child I fretted about things I could not control. Thoughts whirled around in my head until I was paralyzed with overwhelming anxiety.
Having grown up in the church I knew I should trust God. "God is in control," "The Joy of the Lord is your strength," "Don't be anxious". As true and well meaning as these things are, they brought little to no comfort when in the grip of such feelings. And let me tell you, that brought me such shame. I felt like a failure as a Christian. Obviously I wasn't really trusting God, anxiety was the proof! Fear and worry are sins, I was told, I should repent. No matter how much I tried to bury or ignore my feelings, they were still there. No matter how much I loved God and believed He was big enough, great enough, victorious enough to conquer my fears, I still felt them. They were still very real for me.
One day, sitting in what used to be a motorcycle dealership in a small town in the Midwest, I heard a sermon about Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane on the eve of his crucifixion. The pastor spoke about the anxiety Jesus felt, the sweat like drops of blood. I had heard the story a thousand times but I never heard it this way. Suddenly, I felt the presence of God comforting me. As if he were saying, "It's okay, child. I understand." Jesus was able to feel that anxiety, and not sin. He was able to feel those things, and still submit to the will of the Father, still choose to trust God in spite of it.
Jesus understands my anxiety?! It seemed too good to be true. He wasn't disappointed in me? Embarrassed by me? Could it be true? My heart felt immediately lighter, like a heavy weight had been lifted. It was okay to feel this way. He was with me. He understood. It may sound strange, but this changed the way I felt about myself and ultimately how I viewed God. I started attending that small church and over the next three years God continued to reveal to me Jesus as the man of sorrows (Isaiah 53:3).
My anxiety never went away, it still comes and goes in waves of intensity. But I no longer felt alone in it, or guilty and ashamed. I knew my God was truly with me in the midst of my sorrow, holding my hand, weathering the storm. That gave me greater courage to endure the hard times. I still have anxiety attacks, sometimes they are debilitating. But what I understand now, and what I want you to understand, is that it is okay to feel these things. It is okay to feel. Sometimes feelings are negative, and that is okay, too. Do we want to feel negative things? Of course not. But that is not a comfort when we do. We can't change the way we feel, so sometimes we just need to give ourselves permission to just feel these things. And instead of trying to hide them or ignore them, we should bring them to the Father. Share them with the Holy Spirit, our comforter and advocate. Not because we are looking for an answer, but because we know we are not alone. And that sometimes is all the comfort we need.
The beauty of Easter is not only that Jesus defeated death and the grave, which is magnificent, but WHY he did it. He did it so he could be with you! So we would no longer be separated by sin. He endured all of that sorrow just so he could be in communion with us. Even in this period of isolation we are so not alone it's not even funny. We have the best company in the universe! Let's spend this Easter enjoying him!
Well said! Feelings are neither good or bad, they help reveal we are thinking. God does not condemn us, when we feel sad, lonely, angry,or anxious. And likewise, he is not exceptionally pleased with us when we feel happy or excited. No one wants to feel the bad feelings. He wants to help us and comfort us when do have them. Well said!
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